ROG blog

When people ask what school our kids go to, and we tell them that we home school them, the answer is almost always the same, “Wow, that’s great, I could never do that.” But you can usually see in their eyes that they don’t really approve, and they immediately peg us as one of those strange families to watch out for. Maybe we are strange, we certainly are a different family than what I was expecting to grow into, but I think that’s a good thing. I like the idea that life still has some surprises in store for me.

The next question they usually ask is, “Why?” There used to be a very long answer because it seemed like a long process in the beginning, but I think enough time has passed now that I can skip to the main points and keep it to a shorter explanation.

Let me begin by saying that we aren’t passing any judgement on people who send their kids to public schools or the teachers who teach in them. The public school has been effective for millions of kids in America. I quite enjoyed my time in school and got a fairly descent education. But the system doesn’t work for everyone. Not everyone learns the same way and the teachers don’t have time to modify their style to adapt to each of those different needs so some people get lost in the shuffle and never really reach their full potential. If you look back at your time in school, you’ll remember those kids that were never in the main groups, the ones who caused trouble, did drugs, dressed strangely or just wanted to be alone. Many of those kids were really smart, but didn’t know how to fit in to a regular school system. They might have been good candidates for home schooling.

My kids started out in a regular public school like most of your kids. Our older son was an OK student, but not really outstanding. His main problem was that he didn’t like to write. He never felt like his printing was good enough, so it would distract him and consequently any time he had to write in class, he fell behind. The teachers would tell him to finish at home, but then they’d also give him homework to do. When he got home, the homework would take hours to do what the teachers expected was 40 minutes worth of work at most. The hours of frustration often lead to anger and tears.

When his 4th grade teacher showed the class new math concepts, he soaked it all in and excitedly mastered each new skill. But after two weeks of working on the same math concepts, he would get bored, start to struggle and fall behind. His teacher’s response to this was to put him in the slow math group and have him do even more work sheets.

After hearing about our situation, one of my wife’s friends (a teacher who also happened to be the G.A.T.E. coordinator for our school district) suggested that we have Alex evaluated by an educational psychologist. We brought him to the psychologist for several sessions after which she told us that he was actually quite bright and demonstrated cognitive reasoning abilities well above his age group. She suggested that we talk to the teacher about modifying his workload so that he could prove his mastery of the material, but not get bogged down with busy work. She suggested that we give him medication for ADD to help organize his thought process. She also suggested that he be allowed to use an Alpha Smart (a small computer for typing in class). This would allow him to write without getting distracted by his penmanship. The teacher agreed to these modifications when we spoke with her and the school principle.

Things looked like they were making a turn for the better. (Alex was happy using his Alpha Smart and said that he could concentrate better during tests when he took the pills.) Then things started to turn back around. Alex didn’t like taking the pills because he didn’t like the way it made him feel the rest of the day. The teacher was moving his workload back up very quickly, maintained that he had to finish any work that wasn’t finished in school at home in addition to his homework. She discouraged his use of the Alpha Smart and got frustrated when he asked to use it. Things weren’t going better. Frustration was mounting for my son, the teacher and us as parents.

My wife’s friend (the teacher/G.A.T.E. coordinator), who was familiar with our situation, suggested that we consider trying the home studies program offered through the school district. There was a teacher on site at our same elementary school who would advise us on how to home school, provide us with materials and do evaluations and state mandated testing to make sure our son was progressing well. She also offered occasional classes within her classroom so that the kids would stay used to the class room environment and hear another voice to teach them.

After one more hectic day in the regular 4th grade classroom, culminating with the teacher yelling at our son for wanting to use his Alpha Smart during class, we decided to try the home studies program and take him off the medication. Things immediately got better. Over the next 6 months, Alex learned two years of math and got a perfect score on his state science exam. (That’s the same test all the regular school students in California take.) He still wasn’t a great writer, but we allowed him to orally answer any exam questions that took more than a couple sentences. Learning is about knowing and being able to communicate the answers, it’s not all about penmanship.

Our younger son wasn’t having any trouble in school, other than occasionally getting in trouble for reading in class when he was supposed to be paying attention to other things. This child really liked to read. When they tested his reading comprehension at school, he was already at a 9th/10th grade level while in the first grade. He was jealous that his older brother got to stay at home and claimed that he was bored in his class, so we took him out as well a few months later.

I have to say that both kids love being able to wake up in a leisurely fashion to a warm home-cooked breakfast at the start of each day before easing into their studies. I remember most of my school mornings as being woken up by my alarm clock, quickly getting dressed, popping a couple of pop tarts into the toaster oven and hopping on my bike to get to school before the first bell. (Note to Mom: I know you would have cooked me breakfast if I had asked for it, but there usually wasn’t enough time and you did make me lunch every day. I love you for that.)

And then…

We stayed with this program within our school for almost two years under the guidance of Barbara Harrison, but with most of the lessons being conducted at home by my wife. It certainly wasn’t always easy. Kids get frustrated with their parents as well as their teachers, so we’ve had our up and down moments, but the nice thing is that we have the freedom to try different things when one direction isn’t working out. Singapore math might make sense to one child, while Saxon math works better for another. We wouldn’t have had these options in school.

My wife heard a lecture at a homeschooling conference by a woman named Resa Brown who wrote a book called The Call to Brilliance. After learning that she also ran a homeschooling program closer to our home, we decided to change schools and learn from her. After reading her book, I got a better appreciation of what kids could do and become when given the right tools and encouragement. I really do believe that all kids have the potential to be great at something, but not all kids have the potential to be great at the same things.

We worked with Resa in the Las Virgenes School District and then the following year at her new charter school, River Oaks Academy. This year we will be doing what is referred to as an R4, which basically means we are creating our own private school. Part of the reason we’re moving on from our previous group is that the curriculum wasn’t rigorous enough for us. Some homeschoolers feel that the children should work at their own pace and shouldn’t be bothered with competing for grades. We disagree on that point. Competition is very healthy in sports and academics. Our kids will be competing for jobs in the near future and we want them to be prepared.

My wife does most of the teaching, I help out with science on the weekends. In addition to our regular school work this year, our kids took some classes through Youth Leadership Project that were really amazing. In Alex’s class “Key of Liberty,” he wrote 20 papers about American History, had two oral presentations, memorized the Declaration of Independence and studied the Constitution in depth. That’s more than I had to do in most of my high school classes and he’s only 13.

What about socialization?

I read somewhere the other day that teachers were blaming the parents for their children doing poorly in school. If that’s the case, is the only role of public school to socialize our children? I’ll admit that my children aren’t the most social and they probably won’t have jobs in sales. Oh well. Our kids have friends that they get together with and they play team sports. There are a lot of good habits that you can learn from socializing in school, but there are also plenty of bad things you can learn. I’m willing to take a chance on this one.

Other benefits…

Our kids have learned a lot through homeschooling. But they also have so much more time for other things. They both practice piano every day, they read voraciously, they are each writing their own novels, they have time for basketball practice and basketball leagues. Our quality of life has improved. The days of whining and crying over extended homework assignments has been replaced with laughter and learning. Another great benefit is the flexibility in our schedules. We can take a day off in the middle of the week to go skiing or camping and make up for it on another day.

Overall, homeschooling has been good for us and I look forward to finding what surprises it brings in the future.

Last week I watched my older son try to make a play in his basketball game in the closing moments that didn’t work. They lost the game, some of his teammates were upset with him and he felt horrible. In the next game, he made the game-winning shot at the end of the game and got hugs and smiles and felt great about himself.

It can be a very short trip from the cellar to the penthouse, but I think we enjoy the view on top more if we’ve gone through the trials of defeat. I remember watching Kobe Bryant shooting airballs in the playoffs against the Utah Jazz when he was just a teenager. Those shots didn’t drag him down, they just pushed him to be a better player. He practiced his butt off to make sure that next time he was in that situation, he’d be prepared.

Failure can help bring out greatness in many people. I imagine that even Michelangelo cracked some pieces of marble before creating David, Rembrandt drew some ugly stick figures and Thomas Edison shocked himself accidentally. Practice makes perfect.

This post was inspired by my younger son, who last night missed on a chance to get a game winning basket. As the tears and sad feelings go away, I can’t wait to see what takes its place.

Well…no, probably not. But I think marijuana could go pretty far in saving North America. And one out of seven continents is a good start. But let’s start with California.

I’m not a pot smoker, so please don’t think this is just the rantings of another pot head. Whatever my mental defects may be, they don’t come from excess of any intoxicants. That being said, in California we have a proposition on the ballot to legalize the usage and distribution of marijuana under certain restrictions (Proposition 19). I hope this passes for a number of reasons.

1. If marijuana were legalized, it could spark an entirely new industry. Millions of new jobs would be created in the farming, cultivating and processing of pot. New jobs equals more income tax for California and the Federal Government.

2. People who smoke pot are going to buy pot anyway. Why not regulate the sale so that we can make sure people are getting safe plants and collect a sales tax on it. Again, more money for California.

3. As the supply of legal marijuana comes readily through California agriculture, less money is funneled to the Mexican drug cartels giving them less power. And do you think that the drug cartels could compete will Walmart if they were selling to the American people? Less drugs coming across our borders would mean less violence in the Mexican border towns.

4. Legal marijuana would be safer marijuana. When buying something covertly in a downtown alley, you don’t really know what you’re getting. With government oversight and competition from other manufacturers, a huge variety of safer pot products would develop. Different strengths, different sizes, different scents, and likely filtered products.

5. Marijuana was initially made illegal in the United States mainly due to pressure from the agricultural community. Not from tobacco farmers, but from cotton farmers. It was really the many uses of hemp that put fear into their wallets, not the intoxicating power of the flower. Again, new businesses could form based on hemp products.

Personally I don’t feel that marijuana is any more dangerous to people than alcohol or cigarettes, and according to some research, is less addictive. And I’m not naive enough to think that all the marijuana sold at the dispensaries is for medicinal purposes, but I do believe that marijuana has medicinal value. This is especially true for people with terminal illnesses. If smoking a joint will help ease their nausea or give them a little bit of an appetite, have a little compassion and let them spark one up.

I’m not a journalist, so I’m sure this seems like I’m rambling at this point, but I do believe that legalizing marijuana could provide a big boost to our economy and help to make our borders safer.

OK, I guess chicken kicken wasn’t really a big part of our annual Baja trip, but I do love saying “Chicken Kicken” I’m sure KFC will steal the phrase from me. You’ll hear more about that below.

Day 1 of our annual fishing trip down to Bahia de los Angeles started early on the morning of September 2. At 2am, Dad picked me up and we hit the road. We met Harald and Adolf around 3am and headed for the border. For some reason they like to hassle us going into Mexico now. I think it’s jealousy over the long lines going out the other way into the U.S. They actually asked if we were bringing beer or tequila into Mexico (who does that?). Anyway the ride was pretty uneventful, but it went very slowly because of all the construction they are doing between Ensenada and Santo Tomas. Next year the drive should be much safer and much quicker since it seems that they are widening the road and straightening out some of the curves.

Dad's focused on the road.

We stopped for a nice breakfast in San Quintin (the town, not the prison) and then journeyed through the hottest part of the desert. Our in-car thermometer showed a high temperature of 116 degrees at one point. Air conditioning would have been nice then, but we made due with open windows. We finally made it across and down to the beach at around 4pm. (Yes, a 14 hour journey). We were met there by Ingrid Goerrissen our “Angel of the Desert” with cold beer. That was good. Just thinking about it makes me tear up a little.

Day 2. We slowly put our boats together and got out on the water. The nice breeze that you feel as you zip along the water is heavenly. We didn’t catch too much on this day. I had 1 barracuda trolling and 4 bass caught from a kayak. Dad only caught one yellowtail, but it was biggest fish of the day, so he won the pot.

Later in the day, I went to the garage to grab a hammer to tap down some nails on the deck. Several chickens and the largest rooster were mulling around the entrance to the garage and did not like my intrusion. The rooster quickly went in for the attack to try to send me away. At first I tried to nudge, then forcefully push him away with my foot, but he kept coming back until I finally punted him about 8 feet off towards the desert. At that point, I was able to go in and grab the hammer. Apparently roosters have small brains because he came after me again while I was holding the hammer. Tempting as it was, I only nudged him back with the hammer and made my escape.

The water is really blue when you go over shallow sandy areas.

Here comes Harald.

Day 3.  Again not much luck for me from the boat, but I did catch 6 more bass from the kayak. I use a small trout pole when I fish from the kayak because I know that I’m going to be catching smaller fish, and this makes it more challenging and fun. I actually landed a really nice Calico bass that was around 2.5 lbs (way larger than average for this fish). However my dad landed another yellowtail from the boat that was a little bigger than his first one and bigger than my bass, so he got the fish of the day and the pot. 2 for 2.

His name is ceviche, but I call him dinner.

Day 4. I caught 3 more bass from the kayak before I lost my lure. Getting a little windy out there anyway. Dad caught a 7 lb. 11oz. Dorado and won the pot again. Seriously? Dad catches 3 fish in 3 days and wins the pot each day. Why do we bother…

Looks like a big one.

First Dorado of the trip.

Did I mention that we like to drink beer when we’re down in Mexico? Well we do, and we were running low already on what had been brought into the trailer, so I needed to go into the garage to get another case of Pacifico out for us. Wouldn’t you know it, more chickens and that darn rooster were hanging around the beer like college students around a liquor store. Clearly, they felt that this was sacred territory and I wasn’t supposed to be there. But this is beer and I was not about to be denied. The rooster attacked my leg like a horny Chihuahua going after the mailman’s leg. He was on me with both feet and his beak before I even knew what was happening. I didn’t have room to get a big kick in, but I did manage to knock him back a few feet long enough to grab a case of beer and make my escape. He crowed loudly, while presumably gazing proudly at my wounded leg, but I did get the beer.

Day 5. Fishing was good this morning. We were only out for about half an hour when we saw a dorado jumping near our boat. About 10 seconds later my reel was zinging like crazy and I knew I had a hookup. It took about 10 minutes to reel the fish in and it was lots of fun watching it jump to try to release the hook and then dive deep to get away. What a powerful fish. A few minutes later it was my dad’s turn for a hookup. His dorado was a pretty similar size, but since it was a male it had a larger head. Could it be that he’d win 4 days in a row?…

We then trolled back home knowing that the fish would taste better if we cleaned them while they were at their freshest. Mine turned out to be slightly heavier (10lb. 11oz), by just a couple ounces.

My first dorado of the trip.

Meet the twins.

The proud fishermen.

After we’d finished filleting the fish and drinking a beer, we notice a pod of dolphins about 100 yards from the shore. We quickly got our things back in the boat and went out to see if they wanted to play. A few of them broke off from the pod and swam alongside our boat. I could see one on each side of the bow of the boat, so I laid down across the front to get a better look at them and all of a sudden a third came up right underneath us. (It’s amazing how they can do that without getting caught be the propeller.) I could almost reach out and touch them. They didn’t stick with us very long and we had more fishing to do anyway, so we headed back out among the islands.

I did manage to catch one more dorado that afternoon before the wind came up and drove us back to camp. It was slightly smaller than the others, but as Harald and Adolf didn’t have any luck, I managed to get the pot for the day. If you aren’t familiar with the name “dorado,” you’ve probably had it in restaurants as “mahi mahi.”

Day 6. Dad and I didn’t have much luck fishing this day. Just a few Sierra mackerels. Adolf one the day with a 3 pound yellowtail. Later Adolf and I went out again and caught a bunch of “fine-spotted jaw fish” which we normally refer to as big mouths. These cod have really light tender flesh and are amazing for fish frying and that’s just what we did. Dad is the man for fish frying. It was delicious as usual.

Dad and I, cruising for more fish.

Adolf and Dad have a beer before the fish fry.

Day 7. We didn’t get too much fishing done on this day because it was a little windy. But I did run out by myself for a short run while there was a slight break in the weather and caught two nice yellowtails, almost 3 lbs. each. I quickly zipped back home to keep the fish fresh so that Ingrid and I could enjoy some sashimi from the yellowtail. (Very yummy, by the way.) My yellowtails ended up being the biggest of the day, but since Adolf was the only other person to fish that day, it wasn’t much of a pot.

Haven’t had any more trouble with the rooster, but he does crow whenever he sees me.

We spent a lot of time under this palapa.

Sharks are even creepy when they're dead.

View from the fish-cleaning hut.

Day 8. The wind was blowing a lot again, but we did manage to go out fishing for a bit. Dad and I were focused on catching more big mouths to take back home for fish fries. Dad caught the biggest of the day (around 3.5 lbs.), and we also caught a few more sierra mackerels. I had never eaten the sierras before this trip and discovered that they are quite good.

I know, I should have been the one climbing the ladder, but she's fast.

Ingrid has lots of friendly dogs. This is Poochie.

Dad and Harald found some shade.

Day 9. Too windy to fish this morning, so we packed up the boats. Looks like my dorado stands as the biggest of the trip, so I win the weeklong pot (yay!) Adolf got a head start and took off early hoping to make it home the same day. We planned to push off by noon and spend the night near San Quintin. We had never been to the bay in San Quintin before so we drove down to the Old Mill Hotel and got a room. Pretty simple accommodations, they tend to cater to American fishermen who don’t need much other than cold beer and a place to store their fishing gear. We had a nice dinner and plenty of drinks at the Molino Viejo.

Sunrise on the last morning.

I still enjoy the desert drive.

Nice restaurant if you're in the area.

They had a nice dock near the hotel.

Day 10. A little bleary headed, we had a nice breakfast and then started the rest of our journey home. It was rather uneventful, but slow stops for Federale inspections and then a long border crossing made for a very long day. It was great to get home and see the family again.

Until next year…so long baja.

I’ve been complaining about this health care bill that the president wants to shove down our throats for a while now. I think the people high up in government these days have forgotten that they are supposed to represent the people and not just their own ideals.

A friend of mine came to visit today and he asked me what I think should happen to people like him who are unemployed buy have medical conditions that require lifelong medication. Is it just “too bad, you’re out of luck” for people like him? It’s kind of a tough question because if the health care bill is passed, a lot of people are going to get screwed financially and I think overall our standards of healthcare will go down. But if it doesn’t get passed, a lot of good people, like my friend, will be in desperate shape.

My friend is a very hard worker. I know that because he used to work for me. And because of that, I feel pretty sure that he’ll get another job soon and be able to take care of himself. Even if it takes a while I wouldn’t feel bad about our government taking care of my friend during his hard times because I know that he’ll work his way back out of it. I guess I just don’t want to have our tax dollars pay for the freeloaders that figure the government owes them something just because they were born on U.S. soil.

I believe in the old saying, “Give a man a fish, he’ll live for a day. Teach that man to fish and he’ll live forever.” I think our government gives out way too much fish.

Ever since I was a small child (and I’m well into my 40s now), people have been talking about the big one here in Southern California. Apparently we’ve been due for our “hundred year quake” for at least the past 30 years. For the first 15 years of hearing about this “Big One”, I scoffed at the scientists who were clearly just guessing that we were due. The earth doesn’t have iCal to help keep it on schedule, heck it doesn’t even have a regular calendar. But in more recent years, every mention of earthquakes makes me check my supplies and make mental notes to prepare myself.

The large quakes they’ve felt in Haiti, Japan and Chile in recent weeks should serve as a reminder to you that these quakes can strike any time and almost anywhere. Japan and Chile have histories of large earthquakes and like it or not, so do we. It’s time to get prepared. Here are a few things you can do.

• Keep a good supply of batteries on hand and of course a battery operated radio so that you can get emergency information.

• Keep a supply of fresh water on hand. I know the experts want you to have what seems like an exorbitant amount, so I won’t go into specific amounts, but make sure you’ve got enough to tide you over for a few days. And remember to refresh your supply every 6 months.

• Have an emergency plan. Know where to meet your family if you’re not together. Agree on an out of state person that you can contact in case you can’t contact people locally. Find the safest place to be in your home during an earthquake.

• You’re probably going to want to eat something, so make sure you’ve got a good supply of non-perishables on hand. Canned or dried foods are great.

• You’ll probably need something to cook with if the gas lines are off. Make sure you have a propane stove or barbecue and plenty of propane to cook for a few days. (You may end up needing to boil water as well)

• We spend a lot of time in our cars, so keep an emergency kit in your car. Make sure to have some food, water, blanket and warm clothes and toilet paper. You may also want to have a book in there in case you’re trapped somewhere for a long time.

• Have some emergency cash stored somewhere. If the power is out in a large area, your credit cards won’t do you a bit of good.

Hopefully our big quake won’t happen for another hundred years, but it sure makes sense to be prepared in case it comes sooner.

Last week I went to a motivational seminar (www.getmotivated.com). I wasn’t seeking anything out, but a friend offered me a ticket, the speakers sounded interesting, and who couldn’t use a little kick in the pants some days. I think I kind of expected the seminar to have somebody like Stuart Smalley standing on the stage telling me that I was somebody, but it wasn’t quite what I expected.

The speakers mostly talked about  how to become a better leader of people, but some of it was aimed at bettering yourself or your wealth. Here’s a snippit of what I heard.

The first presenter was Rick Belluzzo “Legendary President of Microsoft”. Rick was also a leader at Hewlett Packard, though I forget his title there. His main points were that as a leader, you should be “Hard-headed and soft-hearted” (My translation of that is be true to your cause, but be sensitive about how your actions affect other people.), and you should “Believe in yourself, and make yourself invaluable.” Sounds pretty reasonable.

The second speaker was Michael Phelps “14-time Olympic Gold Medalist”. I thought he was an odd choice at first because he’s not much of a speaker, but he really is a great example of self-motivation. I did actually get a few good points from him.
• Start with a plan
• Admit mistakes, learn from them and move on.
• Repetition is the best form of learning.
• How you approach work on days when you don’t want to, defines greatness. (I quite like that one)

Our third speaker was General Colin Powell “World Famous Soldier-Statesman”. He was easily the highlight of our afternoon. Whatever preconceptions I had about a stodgy old military man were soon quashed by this extremely engaging and eloquent man. He told stories about his time as Secretary of State, as Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, and as National Security Advisor. One amusing story of his came as National Security Advisor when he found himself at a table with Mikhail Gorbachev. Up to this point, Colin Powell had basically spent his entire military career trying to keep the Russians at bay, so imagine his chagrin when Gorbachev told him, “Mr. Powell, you’re going to have to find a new enemy.” (I’m sure it was better when he told it).

General Powell would really have liked the YETI note system we have at my office. He himself often wrote little post-it notes to his people just because he knew how much it would mean to them to hear from him how much they were appreciated. A couple of the points he brought up were:
• You need to build trust within your organization
• Great leaders often have to make changes

Our fourth presenter was Zig Ziglar “America’s #1 Motivator”. Zig has been doing this kind of thing for 50 years and is really quite a motivator and enjoyable person to listen to. Some points from his presentation include:
• Live without worry.
• What money won’t buy, is more important than what money will buy.
• If you can do better, do better.
• You can have everything in life that you want, if you help everyone else get what they want.

Our fifth presenter was a financial investor named Phil Town. Essentially he was there to tell you how to beat the stock market. All you have to do is purchase his software program. I won’t go into that, and you should probably look closely at things that seem to good to be true.

Our sixth presenter, after a rousing rendition of God Bless America, was Condoleezza Rice “Former Secretary of State”. Condy had some interesting stories about her upbringing and being Secretary of State, all while expressing her continuing belief in America and the eternal optimism of its people. She strongly believes in The Essential American Myth, that “It doesn’t matter where you come from, it matters where you are going.”

The seventh presenter was one of the people responsible for putting on the seminar, Tamara Lowe “Top Sales Training Expert”. She shared her rags to riches story with us and a little too much religious expounding, but she did have some interesting points on how different people are motivated differently, so you need to find out more about people in order to motivate them properly.

There were a couple more presenters after this, but to be honest, at this point we were pretty motivated by not getting caught up in horrendous traffic, so we left a little early. I enjoyed most of the presentations and think that a lot can be gained from going to seminars like this, but I’d warn everyone to listen and think before bringing out their credit cards.

Now get back to work.

Do you ever get those moments when seeing a smile makes you smile?

Sunday morning I was watching my younger son ride his new bike. It’s still a little too big for him, but he’s proud that he’s able to ride it anyway. Watching the smile on his face as he took laps around the block really made me happy inside. Later that afternoon my older son lay on the couch reading a book when he suddenly burst out laughing. That sudden bit of happiness filled the room and made me chuckle as well.

I guess laughter and smiles are both contagious.

Do you ever wonder why we send Christmas (or “Holiday”) cards? I think nowadays we send them out because we feel obligated to. Our parents sent them, our aunts and uncles send them, so we have to keep sending them so nobody gets offended. Luckily now we can go to Costco or order personalized cards through Shutterfly or iPhoto and quickly crank out a bunch of cards and get the obligation over with. Isn’t it great that you don’t even have to write anything on the card because it’s already printed?

The answer is no.

Back to my original question. Christmas cards used to be sent out to our friends and family to let them know we were thinking of them and wishing them well this time of year. When you take the time to hand write out these cards, you’re forced to actually spend a moment or two thinking of the people you’re sending the cards to. You can relate a fond memory or just truly wish them well. And if you say that you hope to see more of them in the New Year, you probably mean it.

Has the digital age ruined Christmas cards? Yes and no. It has made a lot of us lazy for sure. The first years that this was available, people were still trying hard to put in a great family picture that was specifically taken for the card. And there was usually a space to write “To:” and “From:”. But lately it seems that people are just putting in the most recent picture they can find of their kids and dumping it into a card and putting in their generic greeting for the year. Cap that off with printed address labels and you don’t need to put any thought into your Christmas cards at all. Congratulations, you’ve fulfilled your obligation. But it doesn’t have to be quite that bad, you really can put some thought into your greeting and show off a nice picture of your family (instead of sending out the reindeer or poinsettia cards that Mom used to send). Just add an extra word or two to personalize it. Hearts will be warmed, just like you originally hoped for.

A pre-printed card without any additional thought doesn’t really mean anything other than you’re fulfilling your obligation to put postage on a card. Save yourself the stamp and just send me an e-mail.

Merry Christmas.